MIRROR BLOG

As the auto made a loud noise and started picking up speed on an empty St Mary's street,I stood alone out side Rain Tree(the hotel).It was around 11.30pm and I was waiting for my mom to come and pick me up.Just as I turned to look at the auto I saw Beda peep out to wave goodbye again.I looked at him smiled and waved back.Beda and I have been...Good friends since 2005.We met online on the yahoo Backstreet Boys chat room lol yes!!We started talking around 12am and talked till 9am the next morning and again the day after and it went on...For the first few months we talked for atleast 4 hr straight!!...I have never met someone soo funny and soo rude ever in my life.It was the 2ed time we had met.It had been a kind of nice but weird dinner.We sat on the roof top restaurant looking over madras, ordered good food and talked about a lot of things.He told me a very touching story about his experience with an auto driver in Hydrabad(where he lives).

It was getting late and we paid the bill and went down, we walked around the hotel while we were waiting for my mom and then I told him to leave as it was getting late and literally pushed him into an auto.As I waved good bye I wondered...Would a guy actually leave a girl in the middle of the night and just go away??(even if I had insisted).Beda and I have been through soo many endless fights, night long chats, drawing sessions on yahoo chat.He would (after I have begged him a lot) call and play the guitar and sing for me.But would he just leave me alone and go off in the middle of the night!?..Yes he did and that's when I sat outside Rain Tree and though about how Beda and I had come so far.In today's day and age, being friends is not an easy thing.With Beda and me, well we really had to make things work.Ultimately till today when I have a real problem and I want to talk to some one about it, I always end up going online at like some insane hr in the morning and he'll be there.And man would I be happy to see that bright yellow face saying "online Beda" on yahoo.

As I sat outside that night in the dark I asked myself, did I make the wrong choice of a friend.Was he so self centered?...Did I really want someone like that?We are always searching for friends and people who will be there for us, was Beda worth all the hurt and rude comments???...

OF COURSE!!!What am I saying!!...So he left me and went home!?? So what??Tomorrow when I call him with tears in my eyes about some thing, hes the one who makes me smile.Yeah we have our difficult times but what the hell...We have what I call "a long distant best-friend relationship" its not going to be easy.But some how even after the worst fights we just need to see each other online to start talking.Its only that day that I realised how thankful I was to have Beda .How importand it is to have a friend who you can count on for anything.Emotionally he is and I guess always be my pillar.I don't think he knows all this but well..Beda now you do!!...

As my car's high beam light flashed straight into my eyes, I thought, some times one doesn't know how lucky he/she is to have certain things in life, but a very very small percentage do know.!!!I'm glad in Beda's case, I'm in that small percentage.
Don't know what I'll do with out you dude!!:-)

Beda's mirror of the story(much better than mine!!)

read the post at @ http://confessionsofamis-fit.blogspot.com/2008/08/golb-rorrim.html

FOUND MYSELF!!

Tamil Nadu is not called the land of temples for nothing.The state has more that 30,000 temples,not a surprise I know.After I finished my psychology a few months ago I was soooo totally lost about what I wanted to do in life,I seriously had no clue at all.Finally some time during April my mom saw this ad in the paper about an arts management course at Dakshinachitra, and I still remember her calling me up during college(some thing she never does)and said ..."shreya,I have found the IDEAL course for you"...and trust me it was!!I applied and got a scholarship and then decided to go ahead with it.In this first semester we study about temple architecture,art and design,2d art,3d art,western art,cultural studies.We have some amaziiing faculty.Each class has some thing soo new and soo different to offer.Its so wonderful to actually study about India and its culture and tradition and art and architecture right from 400 B.C.And some times it is sooo mind blowing that I really wonder....O my god..!!why is it that like only 1% of Indians know all this....Its really blows me away... but I am so happy that I have taken it up.Its like some body is paying me to actually FIND MYSELF... and ill tell you why...!!

Some people tell me...psychology and what I'm doing now has no connection and that "I'm still lost"....NO!!....Finding yourself is when you end up doing some thing that you don't want to stop doing..!!!One subject that I'm obsessed with right now is temple architecture and its all because of one person Dr.CHITRA MADHAVAN.She is just simply.....out of this world.We have been studying week after week about soo many temples in detail.Its history,its architecture,who bulit it, why, inscriptions, legends, sculptures, paintings....my god its just amazing.In other words I'm just trying to find meaning and a history and tradition in my life.Ive been going to temples for years.....but little did I know the meaning behind things,the history,the scuptures.When you find out where you come from,it makes a biiggg difference.It has some how I donnno how...created such a strong sense of self concept with in me.Its like I'm a different person.I would have never imagined me blogging about this but here I am.At last.....FINDING MYSELF!!!!....

O i should also mention that Dr.Muthukumar swamy is a genius!!He teaches us cultural studies....which is (to put it in my own words)nothing but the study of "the psychology behind cultures"...Belive me!! I wake up Tuesdays and Thursdays with a big smile on my face because its time for CULTURAL STUDIES.

Anyway ...Im getting carried away here.I am going to talk to you about 1 just 1 of the many many temples we have been studying about.I'm writing about this temple because I visited it just this Sunday with some of my classmates..!Its 1.5kms from Kachipuram and its a 7th century Pallava temple.The Pallava kings were the great Mahendra Verman I followed by Narasimha Verman I also called as Mamalla, as he built all the temples at Mamallapuram (known today as Mahabhalipuram).His great grand son Narasimha Verman II is the one who built the Shore temple at Mamallapuram, and after that, this great master piece called the Kailashnatha temple at Kanchipuram, which was the capital city of the Pallava's.This temple....I do not have words to describe.I have only taken like some 300 pictures of it and I'm still not satisfied.Every inch of the temple has some sculpture or some inscription.Hope you guessed by now that its a Shiva temple.Narasimha Verman II also called Rajasimha built the vimana and the temple itself.For those of you who don't know the vimana is the structure above the garbha graha(the sanctum sanctorum).Inside the garbha graha there is a large sculpture of Somaskanda(shiva and Uma both seated with skanda in between) and in front of it there is a large linga.Rajasimha also built 58 sub shrines...all of which have Shiva in different forms like as Somaskanda(mostly), Dakshinamurthy, Nataraja, Gangadhara, Lingod Bhava murthy, Tripura Antaka and Durga and many many more sulptures...It is said that Rajasimha's wife Rangapathaka was a beautiful dancer and having her in mind,were the many karna's in this temple carved.A lot of scholars believe that Rajasimha made so many sculptures of Somaskanda to high light that fact that, what skanda was to shiva, Rajasimha was to his father Parameshwaran I. Rajasimha also inscribed in this temple 250 titles that he had got.But sadly while building the temple Rajasimha died.Hence his son Mahendra Verman III (who also lived a short life) completed this temple and built the very first gopura(a small one)in south India.And that is how the tradition of gopura's started.

Even today this temple is soo beautiful to look at.The architecture is so .....amazing!!I can't even image how it would have been in the 7th century.But we do know that when the Chalukya king Vikram Aditya II came and conquered Kanchipuram he came to this temple he was sooo astounded by its beauty, he gave what ever he had looted to the temple,and he not only did that..He also took back with him to Karnataka the architect of the temple and built one exactly the same way!!...We know all this through inscriptions...He has also inscribed in the walls of the temple that 'he who tampers with this temple will go only to hell'.There is another inscription in this temple that says "The top of the temple touches the clouds (and hence) robs the beauty of Kailashnath".And so 1500 yrs later...This temple made of sand stone still stands strong and very much in worship in Kanchipuram.I feel extremely blessed to have gone and got the darshanam of Kailashanatha....